never gonna stop?
well basically when i finished my call a while ago, i immediately packed my things and went to ferdie and invited him to come home. but it took him so long so i was not able to ait for him any longer because i wanted to go home and get out of this messed up palce. just what i thought. tl and ferdioe had this conversation about me. first of all ferdie talked about his interview as a workforce. then tl asked about what my problem is. well i told ferdie that i don't have a problem i am the problem. told him not to mentione anything to her because i don't want her talking to me and reiterating things to me for me to understand. well basically i understand things it's just that i could not accept the bitter truth but i have to swallow the bitter pil to the bitter end. meaning i got to stick it out. well what i'll do is never talk about it if we have a coaching session. i would go with the performance and move on. well ferdie mentioned one thing that if ever my stats are good and all she might defer my promotion or everything will change just for my promotion. well i told him that i don't care. it's her discretion and i don't really care about the team already and i really wanted to get the hell outta here. iwant to be transferred to another team than in this team becuse it really sucks.
o well life is ever so strange so full of change and i don't care about them anymore. i am still here in this team because of ferdie, my friend, and not because of the team or because of her. i believe that ihave been hoazed and all of these things going on are planned or one of their evil plans. you can say that the way i think now is just like ron, as what she said to ferdie a while ago that i'm becoming ron, well i'm way too different from him and i'm not like him at all. one thing that i can broing them down is to make them feel paranoid about stuff. ha! i know her weakness and she'll suffer and feel the agony that she had given me. i intentionally stayted here on my station far from her station because i really don't want to see her face even hear her and as well as fish and his minions. team building? nah, i won't come at all, i won't make any excuses but i will not really come with them and i would say that i' m not a part of the team anymore. i self proclaim that i'm not a part of this freaking pathetic team just like what happened to ron. i should have been transferred to chad's team than me being stuck in this team because domination has conquered the team especially favoritism. yeah she can say to my face that she does not have any favoritism in this team, i don't htink so. i really don't think so. right now, she had given me a reason not to trust her at all. since she's the boss, i would follow her orders adn stuff, but i will not divulge with their personal shits and craps. my trust in them had dessiminate.
as long as i have my job, that's fine. don't them dare to make a reason for me to be trerminated in this company or i will get back to them. as you can see tl is not yet around and i'm thinking why? well i don't care. it' a good thing that she'snot around so i will be free, mwahahahahahhaha!
well i just received an email from tl and asking me how was i and stuff, well i just read it and never replied on it. then i logged off from the email access in the office. well i'm not going to get any imprtant information anyway all are spams and i don't really like their punch lines and it's a waste of time. i don't want to talk about it anyway with her. it's going to be senseless and worthless. i know what i am doing is not benefiting anyone so leave me alone. if ever she'll approach me to talk about it well she's just wasting her time. i won't even tell her that anyway. whatever way she would plan for me to say ti to her, well i won't give in. i don't care if my promotion will be deferred or whatever, i don't care. as long as i have my own life, well that's good. now as of the moment i can hear mr fish here talking to ferdie about some technical stuff and i just hate to hear his freaking voice. he's a menance to me. i will not say that theyactually won, they're just having fun with the bad things they are doing and i'm not envious about that. it's better to be sad because you're doing your best to achieve goals rather than being happy and achieving goals in a wrong bad hideous way. finally it's my day off and i am so ever happy tah i will be meeting rex again and download stuff and talk about stuff and building friendship. by the way i have received a testimonial from him and i'm wondering what testimonial woud i give him. i want it long and meaningful. i'm not good at complementing people but i can show to them that i appreciate them. which i don't see in most people who i have helped in some ways, but that's alright i'm not asking for anything in return. for me it is a satisfaction or an achievement helping people in some ways to let them live their lives. moving on, i wonder if he will be available tomorrow for me to come over to his place. hopefully he would agree my visit on him to morrow so i don't have to stay home and make my brain stress out with the things that has been going on. but i do have another option, if ever he would be busy tomorrow and i could not come in his place i would just rather go to precious' house and talk about these craps that i have been suffering with. well, we had a chat earlier and i've shared what had happened to me these past few days and invited me for a coffee a while ago but it was cancelled and postponed because of her egoistic stupid boss. i was pissed off that moment because i woke up early just to get prepared to get out of the house early for her then suddenly sunday, it is cancelled by that stupid boss of hers. that's alright at least i have another day to meet her.
before i forget, yesterday when i got in the jeep, ferdie texted me and asked me where i was. i did not reply because basically i don't have a load. he also asked me what my problem is. of course i could not reply to that message. then i apologized to him when i saw him here in the office earlier. he understands and he knows.
o i just can't wait to end the shift. or shall i say for the shift to end. i'm fed up with all of the people around here in this freaking station. i just can't wait to take my lunch first and go home. so i can do things that i like. i hope it's april 5 so i may know if i'll be regularized or not. well, i do believe i will be regularized but no incentives because of that darn csat crap. because of that stupid customer and narrow headed monster, i got a low grade. i even explained to him that it's out of our scope and he failed me. what an unreasonable freaking bastard. if ever i have the chance to check that shit again, i will change the status of the product to stolen so he could not get any support again, mwahahahaha. and if i capture that person's email, i will send multiple spams. and that would be good and satisfying **evil grin**
i wonder why it is not queueing? that's not fair, because when i was a floorwalker i have to end my floor walking task just to take calls. then now it is not queueing and this new people who has been given a task will be able to do the floor walking on time. that's not fair. that's why i'm hoping it's queuenig so that people who are assigned as an fw will take calls, mwahahahahaha!
well fish's minions keeps approaching me and asks me how my calls are. well basically i would just tell them ok then went back to my call. i don't have to build any rapport to them beccause basically i don't really like them and i really am irritated and annoyed with what they have done and actually doing. i feel like they are doing things nice to me because in the back of their heads they have a grave palns for me to bring me down. well i don't have to worry about that because they're nothing to me and i do believe that they are pretty much immature and people can see that. they are old enough but they way they are acting is like a 5 year old kid. very unprofessional. anyway going back t o the mature and professional life, it's 1:09 am and i'm about to take my lunch momentarilly then few hours later, i will go straight home, mwwahahahahaha! good luck with me later. i wonder how my mom was. i wonder if she enjoyed watching the concert with her highschool classmates.... i am beginning to wonder now, if it is true that the adjustments will be sent to our atms later or on tuesday? i wonder if i am one of the people who will have that adjustment. hopefully, so i can buy that hardware as soon as possible.
so basically i'm on lunch right now and was not able to take it with ferdie because his lunch is early. well i wonder if ever the queue would increment today. hopefully itwould stay as was it has been. so it won't be too much pressure for me and some of the colleagues here not including the fws. based on the song i'm listening now, it's alright i'm ok god can explain, i think. well i just got off from the smoking chamber and i managed to plug in a 2-piece earphone in my ears and play it so loud that i could hear noone. well i was left alone in the area and this person, which is fish's frined , a QA, saluted and greeted me. so i just raised him an eyebrow and never speak. i was a bit uneasy because i was wondering if he was talking to me or asking me something which i don't and i can't even hear for me to reply. buy anyway, suddenly another QA came in so i said to myself, you have someone to talk with, then momentarily i finished my cigar and left, meeting a team mate and just raised my eyebrow just to have a courtesy with that bang hole. so now you found me here typing and adding more things that i witness during break and stuff.
when i went to the pantry i met ferdie and tapped him on his shoulder and he was just done eating and left the pantry. he told me that we will be going home together so he will wait for me or vise versa. hopefully i won't have to wait for 48 years before we leave this messed up place. i am much excited to take my off and do things that i wanted to realx and free myself from this pain, sorrow and patheticness in life. well i don't know if i have to reply on the email tl sent me about how i am. well she's pretty much paranoid about the way i'm acting now. i did not stay on my station and i always isolate myself. ha! i don't care if she gets tired compromising with me. i 'm not asking her anyway. all i want is for her to leave me alone and let me live mylife. i don't care if she would not give anything for me to do or assign me for a certain task. i'm not looking forward for it anymore. i'll just wait and be patient with what will happen. i do believe that i will achieve my goals someday, somehow. i'm so tired of staring at the sun. i wanted to free myself from these craps, but i just can't and i don't know how. i am looking for a happy medium but it looks like it's not looking for me. solace as you will know. i wonder when will i be able to get that and find that. it's so irritating that i could just kill myself now and die. i'm so pathetic.
it seems like anywhere i go everything turns out so bad and routinary. i don't know really if this is my purpose or destiny or i just don't have a purpose at all. can somebody tell me please so i can set my mind to that thinking. i should have been someone else, but what can ido now? just to have a bitter pill to swallow and stick it out to the bitter nend. i feel like no one's interested to listen to me and even hear me. when i try to speak and tell them what i'm feeling they don't even listen and they would even say to me to speak up and be conversal or vocal. i even imagine, when i'm dying, i haven't talked to anyone about what i am really feeling. so sad that my life will reamin a mystery. that's cool. i know i did my best but it's not good enough, it turns out so bad that everyone would almost abhor me and they would reject me and so i feel dejected. o well, that's life that's real life anyway. i think life is manipulating me and i'm not the one manipulating it. that's wy things turn out so bad and wrong. so i come out as a walking mistake. i would even hear something about my family being discriminated and stuff, and i just hate that crap. well ther's always a divine justice to get them.
o well what ellse can i say? but just to live life accordingly and approrpiately and see what tomorrow will bring for me.
ciao!
o well life is ever so strange so full of change and i don't care about them anymore. i am still here in this team because of ferdie, my friend, and not because of the team or because of her. i believe that ihave been hoazed and all of these things going on are planned or one of their evil plans. you can say that the way i think now is just like ron, as what she said to ferdie a while ago that i'm becoming ron, well i'm way too different from him and i'm not like him at all. one thing that i can broing them down is to make them feel paranoid about stuff. ha! i know her weakness and she'll suffer and feel the agony that she had given me. i intentionally stayted here on my station far from her station because i really don't want to see her face even hear her and as well as fish and his minions. team building? nah, i won't come at all, i won't make any excuses but i will not really come with them and i would say that i' m not a part of the team anymore. i self proclaim that i'm not a part of this freaking pathetic team just like what happened to ron. i should have been transferred to chad's team than me being stuck in this team because domination has conquered the team especially favoritism. yeah she can say to my face that she does not have any favoritism in this team, i don't htink so. i really don't think so. right now, she had given me a reason not to trust her at all. since she's the boss, i would follow her orders adn stuff, but i will not divulge with their personal shits and craps. my trust in them had dessiminate.
as long as i have my job, that's fine. don't them dare to make a reason for me to be trerminated in this company or i will get back to them. as you can see tl is not yet around and i'm thinking why? well i don't care. it' a good thing that she'snot around so i will be free, mwahahahahahhaha!
well i just received an email from tl and asking me how was i and stuff, well i just read it and never replied on it. then i logged off from the email access in the office. well i'm not going to get any imprtant information anyway all are spams and i don't really like their punch lines and it's a waste of time. i don't want to talk about it anyway with her. it's going to be senseless and worthless. i know what i am doing is not benefiting anyone so leave me alone. if ever she'll approach me to talk about it well she's just wasting her time. i won't even tell her that anyway. whatever way she would plan for me to say ti to her, well i won't give in. i don't care if my promotion will be deferred or whatever, i don't care. as long as i have my own life, well that's good. now as of the moment i can hear mr fish here talking to ferdie about some technical stuff and i just hate to hear his freaking voice. he's a menance to me. i will not say that theyactually won, they're just having fun with the bad things they are doing and i'm not envious about that. it's better to be sad because you're doing your best to achieve goals rather than being happy and achieving goals in a wrong bad hideous way. finally it's my day off and i am so ever happy tah i will be meeting rex again and download stuff and talk about stuff and building friendship. by the way i have received a testimonial from him and i'm wondering what testimonial woud i give him. i want it long and meaningful. i'm not good at complementing people but i can show to them that i appreciate them. which i don't see in most people who i have helped in some ways, but that's alright i'm not asking for anything in return. for me it is a satisfaction or an achievement helping people in some ways to let them live their lives. moving on, i wonder if he will be available tomorrow for me to come over to his place. hopefully he would agree my visit on him to morrow so i don't have to stay home and make my brain stress out with the things that has been going on. but i do have another option, if ever he would be busy tomorrow and i could not come in his place i would just rather go to precious' house and talk about these craps that i have been suffering with. well, we had a chat earlier and i've shared what had happened to me these past few days and invited me for a coffee a while ago but it was cancelled and postponed because of her egoistic stupid boss. i was pissed off that moment because i woke up early just to get prepared to get out of the house early for her then suddenly sunday, it is cancelled by that stupid boss of hers. that's alright at least i have another day to meet her.
before i forget, yesterday when i got in the jeep, ferdie texted me and asked me where i was. i did not reply because basically i don't have a load. he also asked me what my problem is. of course i could not reply to that message. then i apologized to him when i saw him here in the office earlier. he understands and he knows.
o i just can't wait to end the shift. or shall i say for the shift to end. i'm fed up with all of the people around here in this freaking station. i just can't wait to take my lunch first and go home. so i can do things that i like. i hope it's april 5 so i may know if i'll be regularized or not. well, i do believe i will be regularized but no incentives because of that darn csat crap. because of that stupid customer and narrow headed monster, i got a low grade. i even explained to him that it's out of our scope and he failed me. what an unreasonable freaking bastard. if ever i have the chance to check that shit again, i will change the status of the product to stolen so he could not get any support again, mwahahahaha. and if i capture that person's email, i will send multiple spams. and that would be good and satisfying **evil grin**
i wonder why it is not queueing? that's not fair, because when i was a floorwalker i have to end my floor walking task just to take calls. then now it is not queueing and this new people who has been given a task will be able to do the floor walking on time. that's not fair. that's why i'm hoping it's queuenig so that people who are assigned as an fw will take calls, mwahahahahaha!
well fish's minions keeps approaching me and asks me how my calls are. well basically i would just tell them ok then went back to my call. i don't have to build any rapport to them beccause basically i don't really like them and i really am irritated and annoyed with what they have done and actually doing. i feel like they are doing things nice to me because in the back of their heads they have a grave palns for me to bring me down. well i don't have to worry about that because they're nothing to me and i do believe that they are pretty much immature and people can see that. they are old enough but they way they are acting is like a 5 year old kid. very unprofessional. anyway going back t o the mature and professional life, it's 1:09 am and i'm about to take my lunch momentarilly then few hours later, i will go straight home, mwwahahahahaha! good luck with me later. i wonder how my mom was. i wonder if she enjoyed watching the concert with her highschool classmates.... i am beginning to wonder now, if it is true that the adjustments will be sent to our atms later or on tuesday? i wonder if i am one of the people who will have that adjustment. hopefully, so i can buy that hardware as soon as possible.
so basically i'm on lunch right now and was not able to take it with ferdie because his lunch is early. well i wonder if ever the queue would increment today. hopefully itwould stay as was it has been. so it won't be too much pressure for me and some of the colleagues here not including the fws. based on the song i'm listening now, it's alright i'm ok god can explain, i think. well i just got off from the smoking chamber and i managed to plug in a 2-piece earphone in my ears and play it so loud that i could hear noone. well i was left alone in the area and this person, which is fish's frined , a QA, saluted and greeted me. so i just raised him an eyebrow and never speak. i was a bit uneasy because i was wondering if he was talking to me or asking me something which i don't and i can't even hear for me to reply. buy anyway, suddenly another QA came in so i said to myself, you have someone to talk with, then momentarily i finished my cigar and left, meeting a team mate and just raised my eyebrow just to have a courtesy with that bang hole. so now you found me here typing and adding more things that i witness during break and stuff.
when i went to the pantry i met ferdie and tapped him on his shoulder and he was just done eating and left the pantry. he told me that we will be going home together so he will wait for me or vise versa. hopefully i won't have to wait for 48 years before we leave this messed up place. i am much excited to take my off and do things that i wanted to realx and free myself from this pain, sorrow and patheticness in life. well i don't know if i have to reply on the email tl sent me about how i am. well she's pretty much paranoid about the way i'm acting now. i did not stay on my station and i always isolate myself. ha! i don't care if she gets tired compromising with me. i 'm not asking her anyway. all i want is for her to leave me alone and let me live mylife. i don't care if she would not give anything for me to do or assign me for a certain task. i'm not looking forward for it anymore. i'll just wait and be patient with what will happen. i do believe that i will achieve my goals someday, somehow. i'm so tired of staring at the sun. i wanted to free myself from these craps, but i just can't and i don't know how. i am looking for a happy medium but it looks like it's not looking for me. solace as you will know. i wonder when will i be able to get that and find that. it's so irritating that i could just kill myself now and die. i'm so pathetic.
it seems like anywhere i go everything turns out so bad and routinary. i don't know really if this is my purpose or destiny or i just don't have a purpose at all. can somebody tell me please so i can set my mind to that thinking. i should have been someone else, but what can ido now? just to have a bitter pill to swallow and stick it out to the bitter nend. i feel like no one's interested to listen to me and even hear me. when i try to speak and tell them what i'm feeling they don't even listen and they would even say to me to speak up and be conversal or vocal. i even imagine, when i'm dying, i haven't talked to anyone about what i am really feeling. so sad that my life will reamin a mystery. that's cool. i know i did my best but it's not good enough, it turns out so bad that everyone would almost abhor me and they would reject me and so i feel dejected. o well, that's life that's real life anyway. i think life is manipulating me and i'm not the one manipulating it. that's wy things turn out so bad and wrong. so i come out as a walking mistake. i would even hear something about my family being discriminated and stuff, and i just hate that crap. well ther's always a divine justice to get them.
o well what ellse can i say? but just to live life accordingly and approrpiately and see what tomorrow will bring for me.
ciao!
posted by ly at 2:15 AM
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