grabe-L sand.......

88sigh88 Another day, another shit another issues. well i left home at 3am and when i tried to lock the door from the inside, i have noticed a car in front of our house and i thought it was a panicing time for me. i have realized that it was my sister. so i have apologized because i just locked the door and so i tried to buzz the door bell to wake them up and open the door. my mom opened the door and my sister told me that her bf will unload me at the bus station, how thoughtful, anyway i have arrived here at 3:30 am very early for me. so i prepared my tools on another station, because my permanent station is taken and it pisses me off big time. anyway, i went ahead and grab a smoke and i just freaking hate what people in thesmoking room talks about. well i heard that this person is from wave 9 and yet he's a floor walker already, and duh, i am from wave 2 and never had any work attitude problems, but i was never give a chance to be a full time floor walker to another tem. i just hate it. it's so unfair and so irritating for me. then this person from wave 0 told me about that and also i have asked him if he is a floorwalker he said that he has not been an fw ever and still a full time agent. found out that he has problems with his attendance, so i told him in a subtle way that i understand if ever you are not being assigned as a floorwalker if you have attendance issues of course but i said that in my case i did not have any attendance issues and all and he told me that i have a good stats anyway and i should be an fw. he once said that he saw me already as a floorwalker. but i told him that for now, i am not designated as a floorwalker again because of some reason, like infractionsa nd stuff, but that was a long time ago. so i thought that it could be possible that tl is taking it personally to or for an agent to be an fw. i just freaking hate her. i forgot to tell him that our oic once had a bad stat but still given a chance to become a fw. too bad for a tearjerker like me. by the way todays friday and tl and fish are not around and so i can do whatever i would want, mwahahahahahaha! pretty good huh?

This guy i was talking with earlier in the gas chamnber to hang on there, and he said i am from wave 0. i told him that in your team there's no question about how their tl decides who will be the floorwalker because as far as i know almost all of the agents in their team are already a floorwalker to another team and also in team peter's team, all of their agents are now promoted and stuff, unlike me in this freaking annoying bastard team. no one is being designated as a florowalker to another team. so it really pisses me off big time and i just wanted to tell tl about it so she will be aware of it. i really believe that there is no career growth in this team and so i pray for me to be designated to another team and i don';t care if ever i should be an agent full time, as long as i have the opportunity to adjust and know where i will start and also to refresh my feelings about that new team. i'm also praying that hopefully i would be interviewed later on as an RTA and hopefully i will pass and absorbed so i would have to leave this messed up, fucked up team. one thing for sure is when i become a floorwalker, i mean RTA i will monitor this fucking fish...

this is actually too much to take and handle.... if only someone here is on my side if ever they would hear this stuff i have in my mind. they would agree with my comments, then i would have a gut to tell tl about this. i really can't determine if she's nice, good or a reasonable tl with what she's doing. these are the possible things for me now:
a: I would become an RTA
b:I would be designated to another team
c: she would be promoted
d: fish would resign or transferred to another team
e: she would be embarrassed with what she's actually doiung....

Those are the possible things that could happen to have a change in my life here at work. aaarrrgggggggggggghhhhhh! i just can't wait for them to disappear from my sight so i can live prosperously..... tangina talaga, the floorwalker that i am seeing now is actually from a lower batch and yet he is a fulltime floorwalker. damn it. i really fucking hate it. what tl's actions i mean action plans are not really reasonable at all.

i really need a major change now. if ever my sister would somehow give bob a chance, basically things will be bigger and brighter for my future. well , i guess there's nothing i can do to make her change her mind and i know she's not after this materials and crap, but hopefully she would somehow accept it and grab it for all of us. i know i'm thinking so much selfishly, but i won't deny that. if you could barely imagine how it'll change our lives, you won't ever worry much about things.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!! I hate my life!!!!!!! wwaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!

**sigh**

ok i'm alright, now....... please for one more chance help me and guide me and enlighten me........

by the way my dad replied on my email yesterday as per mom's request and my eldest sister's request to enlighten them up. ok fine..... please make this day, somehow convincing and good, so i can live my day and hopefully when i come home things are just dandy....i just hate it when i see lower batches are all fulltime floorwalkers and me i'm just a pathetic phone junkie agent.

well by the way i did something again that could cause something bad. i just went to break without informing the fw and i was ashamed and embarrassseed because the fw said tahat i should inform him first. ok i'm bad. sorry i will not do that again. i apologize for my incompetence and stabborness. shit! i found out that this person is really a strict person and he really deserve to be promoted with that attitude. in my persepective he's just new and a lower batch and yet he think that he's ahead of us. my goodness, i hate it but i'm sorry. i will try to be like that too. if i become a floorwalker and he did that i will inform him also to inform me first before doing stuff that needs to be saked first before executing that action. hmph! prick!

ok back to the real world what could possibly happene today? i'm not really certain about it and i really would like to have a change now. i just can't stand this torments that ihave in htis fucked up place. i wish i could live my life alone and conviniently. if only it is possible for me to have a wonderful life. i f only my sister would just go ahead and marry that guy, i could hardly imagnie how life will be convinient. i'm not a makapal mukha person to go ahead and say it directly to that guy that i wanted this and that. but somehow they would jsut approach me and aske me if i want to have this and that and i will really grab it. how i wish..... aaaaaarrrrrrrrrgggggghhhhhhhh! i can't stand this confusion and botherness inside. i feel like if i could just die right now. please give me a sign that things will be ok and jsut dandy from now on. please!

anyway waiting for my rocket to come and waiting til my head spins around just to end the day. i just can't wait to come home and leave this place. it feel so dull and uncompfortable and i just freaking hate it whenever i am embarrassed or something. i hope that my sister would change her mind somehow. hopefully i will be interviewed by olive today and if not, then it will be on saturday or i believe monday. haaaay, so irritating no progress yet with my application.

anyway i had this conversation with jp,. a nice guy in the wave, well he told me stuff like what her wife has been doing in regards to cci, you know what that is. they were able to get gadgets online and stuff for free and i have asked jp to order one for me in a joking manner but he proposed that he will try to get one and stuff, for me, how nice. i believe that he really appreciates me and all since i'm the only person who barely understands him and spoent time with him here and i do believe that he is enjoying my company. i really appreciates that big time. hopefully they would order one for me so i can be happy for once, mwahahahaha!

anyway nothing much to discuss for now, so maybe see you later.... ciao!