I'M FREAKING FED UP.........uhuhuhuhuhuhu!
hi good morning. it's 5:52 am and i'm in a different workstation again. that's fine at least i don't have to worry about people that surrounds me. ok moving on, last night, i was able to write a letter for that person. it's something loike, a message intended for him. as if he could hear me or even, as if i will send it to him. well i'm not going to send it to him. i wrote that just to release my anger and pain from within. well i guess he won't mind. i don't care. as long as that person needs me, well i'm here. that person can just use me whenever and however and wherever he wanted. i'll always hear that person. i just realized that, it is my purpose. to be used up until they've consumed all the things they wanted from me. i don't know what it is, but i believe something in me. "who wants to be a millionaire?
thankfully, i was able to build rapport and happiness with my mom yesterday. i pity her pretty much, but i just don't care and do things to show that i care for her. i guess it's because of my ego and pride. well i really wanted an extreme change. i hope i won't have to worry and have wearies about, you know, people like that person. at least i will feel alive. i received a letter from BPI. i applied for a credit card. of course i was denied and they're offering another promotion and option that i can get. well it's not my loss. good luck with their business. mwahahahahaha! i guess GOD has a purpose why i was denied. that's alright and i don't really care. "
earlier, i went to the smoiking room. i met Mark. he's so nice and comfortable to talk with. he's nice in general. at least he manage to remember me and even to talk with me. anyway, i still have the word deceit in my mind. moving on, we talked about stuff and stuff and stuff, then stopped because others went in the room. i stopped for a moment, then sat on the floor. then my 2 batchmates came in and had a few chitchats about their craziness in life. then i was left in the room. then few minutes later new people just came in and so momentarily i left the rroom. then went straight to my station and opened up my tools and kept checking my usual station. well i'm not planning to transfer there since i've already, setup my tools in this current station where i'm at.
honestly, there are things that goes into my head and i don't want to think about it. it's pissing me off. bahala ka sa buhay mo! you have your life, i have my life too, so let me live my life. moving on, i've emailed ferdie, asking him what did precious say to her. well i don't have any reply yet. still waiting. what in the world is going on here? i don't even have any clue. i'm not really excited because it's pay day. it's such a disgrace. you'll get your money then automatically you have to pay for these freaking bills and wondering if there will be left. anyway, let's just move on ith the rest of the day.
well we had a meeting again. regarding the recogniton for the best team ever. ok i was pissed off. i hated it. after the meeting, i went and took myy first break ever. then i finally saw that person. asked me how i was and stuff. told me that , that person already listened to the cd, kenny g, and it was good and stuff. i did not talk much then he left. ok so waht's the commotion? GOD, what a bummer. so irritating. why do i have to see that person. i'm not expecting to see that person. i don't want to bring back the feelings and stuff. now it made me feel so sad, bad and evidently mad. well good luck. hope you have a nice life. so long sucker! you go ahead and have fun with your wonderful life, beautiful to be specific. uhuhuhuhuhu! i don't like this. i hate myself. i hate my freaking face and all. gees, this is so annoying. another dumb soliloquy. this is not what i wanted after all. but it keeps coming back to me. argh!
here i go again with my patheticness. why do i have to suffer like this. why do i have to carry out this burdens i have and i feel inside. it's a hassle and unlikely unpleasant to me. so that's it? how are you and i like the disc it's nice? that's it? is there anything else you can say. i guess you are the one who had abandoned us. not us. you're so inconsiderate. selfish and reckless. you don't exactly know what i'm feeling right now. i thought friendship will last for a life time. you were and you are deceiving. you're the one who's pretentious. why don't you just kill me now? i wish i'd never met you. i wish i can go to canada now and start living there. if i finally manage to forget you, don't you ever mingle with me. damn you! you know what, i want to sleep now. i want to wake up until tomorrow. i don't wanna think about this. .it's really dragging me down. i'm going to read the book that ia m reading.
well i took myy lunch with ferdie and with rikk. well we've talked about stuff and stuff and stuff. i even managed to talk with rikk, coz i've noticed that he's beginning to get out of place. i'm not comfortable with that. it's ok if it's me. as long as others don't feel that. it'll be ok. then went ahead and grabbed a smoke and i've met jp and rikk also. we've had conversation like, dubai and some situations during a call and i was amazed that they were able to laugh at my jokes. that's a good experience and i was bale to set aside for a moment my confusions, pain, wearies and uneasiness. but now, still thinkng about it. darn it. why can't it just go away. well anyway i don't know whether i should be happy or sad. today's payday. i am planing to buy me a pair of shoes and of course that sim reader. i don't know whether if it is still available. hopefully, it is. i even wonder if it will still be available. i just checked my clock and i still have 7 minutes and counting til i take another call.
by the way, before i take my lunch, i had a coaching session with my tl. talked about what best practices i'm doing to achieve my targets exceedingly. well, one thing i said was to do the best thing you are doing. i told her that as far as i know i just maintain what and how is my call flow to achieve it. i'm not really particular with the stats. as long as you know you're doing just fine, that's good enough. she find me not too confident. because i'm setting too much expectation that i will try but not promising anything. so it's bad. i don't know. it's because i'm too humble and so it's too bad. too much of something is really bad enough. i understand that. anyway, just being what i am. o men, i'm so tired and sick of this all. i wonder what will be the outcome of everything i am doing here. o well, life goes on......hopefully this will be the company that would help me grow and stand tall. eventhough a lot of people i meet drags me down, does not value or treasure my friendship, that's ok. as long as i can live my life, that's good enough. as long as i don't step on anyone, i don't demotivate thnm and discourage them, i think that's good enough. in addition is as long as i help them and feel or make them feel that i'm here to encourage and motivate them without them appreciating that. i know god knows...odo you get what i mean? ok i got 2 minutes left. see you around.....
welll i kept trying to look and download a crack for the opm2 software. it seems so hard to look for the exact version that i had installed in my system. datrn t. anyway i'll kjeep looking.....well it ended up nothing and unworthy. i was not able to find any available crack for it. i think i just need to wait for about a month and so to have it available. darn it.
i'm still thinking if ever i should buy me a sim reader. i'm a bit confused and pissed off. ...will you give me any new scenarios here and changes so i can motivate myself and make my day so exciting? geees, i'm so tired of thinknig shits and all. i'm so fed up and i'm pretty tired. barely tired. my mind is restless. i can't think straight. i kept thinknig of things to make me happy and at ease. it is so unpleasant that i need to feel this way. sinusumpa ko talaga na mararanasan nya ang nararanasan ko ngayon at he'll ask for me to help and guide him with all the sufferings at doon nya mare-realize lahat! sinusumpa ko talaga!
aaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgggggggggggggggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
i'm so amazed and inspired like i could kill them especially him!
anyway, it's 1:39 pm. the day is almost done. ok it'll be a happy day. i wonder how much will i get today. hopefully it's 2 digits, how i wish. well gotta park my hands (baduy!) see you again perhaps tomorrow? how i wish i'm dead tomorrow. anyway, whatever happened to me, just be there and whoever reads this blogs that i'm posting, you'll stay inquisitive aboout these posts. good luck!
thankfully, i was able to build rapport and happiness with my mom yesterday. i pity her pretty much, but i just don't care and do things to show that i care for her. i guess it's because of my ego and pride. well i really wanted an extreme change. i hope i won't have to worry and have wearies about, you know, people like that person. at least i will feel alive. i received a letter from BPI. i applied for a credit card. of course i was denied and they're offering another promotion and option that i can get. well it's not my loss. good luck with their business. mwahahahahaha! i guess GOD has a purpose why i was denied. that's alright and i don't really care. "
earlier, i went to the smoiking room. i met Mark. he's so nice and comfortable to talk with. he's nice in general. at least he manage to remember me and even to talk with me. anyway, i still have the word deceit in my mind. moving on, we talked about stuff and stuff and stuff, then stopped because others went in the room. i stopped for a moment, then sat on the floor. then my 2 batchmates came in and had a few chitchats about their craziness in life. then i was left in the room. then few minutes later new people just came in and so momentarily i left the rroom. then went straight to my station and opened up my tools and kept checking my usual station. well i'm not planning to transfer there since i've already, setup my tools in this current station where i'm at.
honestly, there are things that goes into my head and i don't want to think about it. it's pissing me off. bahala ka sa buhay mo! you have your life, i have my life too, so let me live my life. moving on, i've emailed ferdie, asking him what did precious say to her. well i don't have any reply yet. still waiting. what in the world is going on here? i don't even have any clue. i'm not really excited because it's pay day. it's such a disgrace. you'll get your money then automatically you have to pay for these freaking bills and wondering if there will be left. anyway, let's just move on ith the rest of the day.
well we had a meeting again. regarding the recogniton for the best team ever. ok i was pissed off. i hated it. after the meeting, i went and took myy first break ever. then i finally saw that person. asked me how i was and stuff. told me that , that person already listened to the cd, kenny g, and it was good and stuff. i did not talk much then he left. ok so waht's the commotion? GOD, what a bummer. so irritating. why do i have to see that person. i'm not expecting to see that person. i don't want to bring back the feelings and stuff. now it made me feel so sad, bad and evidently mad. well good luck. hope you have a nice life. so long sucker! you go ahead and have fun with your wonderful life, beautiful to be specific. uhuhuhuhuhu! i don't like this. i hate myself. i hate my freaking face and all. gees, this is so annoying. another dumb soliloquy. this is not what i wanted after all. but it keeps coming back to me. argh!
here i go again with my patheticness. why do i have to suffer like this. why do i have to carry out this burdens i have and i feel inside. it's a hassle and unlikely unpleasant to me. so that's it? how are you and i like the disc it's nice? that's it? is there anything else you can say. i guess you are the one who had abandoned us. not us. you're so inconsiderate. selfish and reckless. you don't exactly know what i'm feeling right now. i thought friendship will last for a life time. you were and you are deceiving. you're the one who's pretentious. why don't you just kill me now? i wish i'd never met you. i wish i can go to canada now and start living there. if i finally manage to forget you, don't you ever mingle with me. damn you! you know what, i want to sleep now. i want to wake up until tomorrow. i don't wanna think about this. .it's really dragging me down. i'm going to read the book that ia m reading.
well i took myy lunch with ferdie and with rikk. well we've talked about stuff and stuff and stuff. i even managed to talk with rikk, coz i've noticed that he's beginning to get out of place. i'm not comfortable with that. it's ok if it's me. as long as others don't feel that. it'll be ok. then went ahead and grabbed a smoke and i've met jp and rikk also. we've had conversation like, dubai and some situations during a call and i was amazed that they were able to laugh at my jokes. that's a good experience and i was bale to set aside for a moment my confusions, pain, wearies and uneasiness. but now, still thinkng about it. darn it. why can't it just go away. well anyway i don't know whether i should be happy or sad. today's payday. i am planing to buy me a pair of shoes and of course that sim reader. i don't know whether if it is still available. hopefully, it is. i even wonder if it will still be available. i just checked my clock and i still have 7 minutes and counting til i take another call.
by the way, before i take my lunch, i had a coaching session with my tl. talked about what best practices i'm doing to achieve my targets exceedingly. well, one thing i said was to do the best thing you are doing. i told her that as far as i know i just maintain what and how is my call flow to achieve it. i'm not really particular with the stats. as long as you know you're doing just fine, that's good enough. she find me not too confident. because i'm setting too much expectation that i will try but not promising anything. so it's bad. i don't know. it's because i'm too humble and so it's too bad. too much of something is really bad enough. i understand that. anyway, just being what i am. o men, i'm so tired and sick of this all. i wonder what will be the outcome of everything i am doing here. o well, life goes on......hopefully this will be the company that would help me grow and stand tall. eventhough a lot of people i meet drags me down, does not value or treasure my friendship, that's ok. as long as i can live my life, that's good enough. as long as i don't step on anyone, i don't demotivate thnm and discourage them, i think that's good enough. in addition is as long as i help them and feel or make them feel that i'm here to encourage and motivate them without them appreciating that. i know god knows...odo you get what i mean? ok i got 2 minutes left. see you around.....
welll i kept trying to look and download a crack for the opm2 software. it seems so hard to look for the exact version that i had installed in my system. datrn t. anyway i'll kjeep looking.....well it ended up nothing and unworthy. i was not able to find any available crack for it. i think i just need to wait for about a month and so to have it available. darn it.
i'm still thinking if ever i should buy me a sim reader. i'm a bit confused and pissed off. ...will you give me any new scenarios here and changes so i can motivate myself and make my day so exciting? geees, i'm so tired of thinknig shits and all. i'm so fed up and i'm pretty tired. barely tired. my mind is restless. i can't think straight. i kept thinknig of things to make me happy and at ease. it is so unpleasant that i need to feel this way. sinusumpa ko talaga na mararanasan nya ang nararanasan ko ngayon at he'll ask for me to help and guide him with all the sufferings at doon nya mare-realize lahat! sinusumpa ko talaga!
aaaaaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrgggggggggggggggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!
i'm so amazed and inspired like i could kill them especially him!
anyway, it's 1:39 pm. the day is almost done. ok it'll be a happy day. i wonder how much will i get today. hopefully it's 2 digits, how i wish. well gotta park my hands (baduy!) see you again perhaps tomorrow? how i wish i'm dead tomorrow. anyway, whatever happened to me, just be there and whoever reads this blogs that i'm posting, you'll stay inquisitive aboout these posts. good luck!
posted by ly at 12:37 PM
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